Incentive

Today started pretty lousy. I woke up feeling really shaky and weak with some nausea. My headache is gone. I actually went back to bed after I took my morning medication and slept for 2 hours. I was laying in bed thinking that I'm not feeling well but I am so much better than I was 2.5 months ago.

When I was in the ICU probably day 3 I experienced some sleep deprivation delirium. I remember waking in the middle of the night panicked and gasping to breathe. I was yelling out for help although I barely had a voice so it was more like a loud whisper. I didn't use the call bell and I can't even tell you why. I know better, I just didn't. A nurse came in and I told her that I was having trouble breathing and she said " if you are yelling you are breathing" I was pissed because I knew something wasn't right and that is something that I have said to a patient thinking it would help them. Well guess what it's not helpful! She reassured me that my numbers were good. This happened multiple times throughout the night. I actually yelled at her once! I'm a nurse and I'm very respectful to the nurses caring for me because I have been in their shoes. This was very out of character for me but I was really panicked and scared. I tried so hard to mentally relax but it just wasn't working.

In the morning when the heart transplant team rounded they informed me that my kidneys were shutting down which means that I was not producing enough urine. They told me that there were two options 1) I might need dialysis or 2) I might need to be reintubated. I was struggling to breathe and I was so swollen my hands and feet looked like balloons. I was so frightened but I knew that something needed to be done to help me. I essentially said where do I sign. I was so anxious waiting for David to arrive so that I could tell him what was happening. He knew something was wrong the minute he walked in the room. It was so terrifying for both of us!

One of my surgeons came in with an incentive spirometer and said "I want you to do this every 15-20 minutes". So I did ! I know the importance of the incentive spirometer but I was not thinking like a nurse in the beginning I was just trying to get through the day. I was still sleeping in 10 minute increments so every time that I woke up David would help me with the incentive spirometer. I was so swollen I couldn't lift my arms or my legs on my own. I can honestly say that by the evening I was improving. The Renal (kidney) doctor decided I wouldn't need dialysis that day. The Renal team continued to follow me for a few more days and thankfully I steadily improve. I certainly feel that the incentive spirometer saved me.

I still have my buddy. I used it a lot when I first came home.

Each 💔 Beat Matters

KellyAnn